I know how hard it is to struggle with your body.
I know how much it can consume your day and your every thought.
“Why can’t I just lose weight”.
“I hate my stomach”.
“Why doesn’t my body look like that”.
“I can’t wear this”.
These thoughts are deafening. They are painful. They take up so much of our energy and our brain space, but mostly they are just exhausting.
I know because I was over consumed by them for nearly two decades of my life.
Making peace with my body was one of the best things I did for my mental health, and it let me do bigger and better things with my life.
If you are struggling with your body image right now, I encourage you to not let your body rule your life and happiness any longer.
What if, instead of hating your body, your goal was to have a peaceful relationship with your body instead?
I know it is a lot easier said than done. Believe me I get it. I have been there, and it does take time, but this is why I want to share with you one of the things that helped me.
1). Respect your body
Body respect is different from body love. It is hard to love our body, and it can be unrealistic for some of us to go from having a negative relationship with our body to one of love. Having good body image doesn’t mean we have to love our body, but what we can do instead is respect it. This means treating our body with nourishment and kindness. It means letting go of the negative self-talk and behaviours, so we can live our lives in happiness, and do the things we want to do. Once we start respecting our body, we can be more present and enjoy life
2). Know there is nothing wrong with your body.
Always remember that there is absolutely nothing wrong with your body. It may not be what we want it to be, but it’s your body, it belongs to you and it deserves respect and kindness. What can you do today to treat your body with kindness?
3). PRACTICE GRATITUDE & BODY APPRECIATION
Practicing gratitude with your body is being thankful and appreciating everything your body does for you. For years, I never a took a moment to thank my body or appreciate it; all I did was punish it. In fact, it never crossed my mind that my body works so hard every day just to keep me alive. I didn’t know this back then, but by continually punishing and trying to change my body, I was not only contributing to my body dissatisfaction, but also negatively impacting my own mental and physical health.
Imagine how different you would feel if you lived in awe of what your body does for you every day?
Here is a gratitude activity to help get you started
Write down all the things you are most grateful for and that you appreciate about your body.
4). Know that body weight or size is not an indicator of health.
The BMI is not an accurate scale. It is is simply a tool that divides weight by your height (squared). It was only designed to monitor the trends in populations over time. It was not designed to measure health. In fact, the old BMI scale was previously 27 for the “overweight” category and was reduced to 25 in the 1980s. This meant hundreds of thousands of people who were a “normal” weight suddenly became “overweight” overnight.
Recent studies further support the inaccuracy, a meta analyses study conducted in 2013, looking at death rates from BMI found that those with a BMI of 25-30 (the “overweight” category) had the lowest death rate, and those in the “obese” category (25-30) had the same death rates of those in the “normal” BMI category [1]. Sadly, it is still used as a measure of health today.
5). Have a wardrobe clear out
Respecting your body means wearing clothes that fit your body now and donating or selling anything that no longer fits you, especially the clothes you are keeping because you hope you will fit into them again at some point. Every time you get dressed and see these clothes that don’t fit hanging in your wardrobe, it damages your relationship with your body. You cannot come to a place of peace while you’re still holding onto them.
I know how tough this is. Believe me. Especially when these clothes are old favourites, or you have spent good money on them. What helped me was donating them – I chose a charity in Sri Lanka and it made parting with them easier knowing they were going to a good cause and would get use again. I know everyone is not in a financial position to do this, so the other option is to sell them.
Once you have donated or sold your clothes, I encourage you to go shopping for new clothes that not only fit your now body, but also make you feel comfortable and confident – because the more confident and comfortable you feel in your clothes, the less you will think about your body.
6). Let go of the comparison
Comparing ourselves to others causes us emotional pain. When these thoughts come up, take a moment to recognise and challenge them. Change them into something more positive, something more powerful – a reminder of you and your uniqueness in this world. Just think how boring would the world be if we all looked the same! Celebrate your uniqueness, as it’s what makes you who you are.
7). Change the negative self-talk
How many times have you found yourself standing in front of the mirror listing all the things you don’t like about your body?
I hear you. I have been there so many times.
Having constant negative thoughts not only makes us feel worse about our body, but can also lead to low self-esteem, feelings of low self-worth and unhappiness.
I encourage you to start reframing your negative thoughts. With each negative thought that comes up about your body, try changing it to a positive one instead.
For example, instead of “I hate my arms”, try, “My arms let me hug my loved ones.”
The more often you do this, the closer you will get to healing your body image and feeling more at-peace within your skin.
8). Practice BODY POSITIVE affirmations.
Positive affirmations are statements that affirm a positive strength, quality or value about your body. By practising them, you can increase body satisfaction.
Affirmations Activity
Write down 5-10 affirmations about your body, and read and repeat them to yourself as often as you can.
It is important to choose ones that are realistic to you and that you truly believe.
Here are some of mine to help get you started.
“My body deserves kindness and respect.”
“My body doesn’t define my self-worth.”
“I am good enough just the way I am.”
“I am so much more than my body.”
“I am thankful for everything my body does for me.”
“I accept my body as it is in this moment.”
9). Let go of the idea that you need to change your body.
Instead focus on treating it with nourishment, kindness and respect. This means decreasing stressful behaviours in life, getting enough sleep and resting when your body needs it. It also means nourishing it with gentle movement and food. Never forget you are enough just as you are.
10). Follow body positivity accounts on Instagram.
Have a total social media refresh and unfollow any accounts that promote unattainable body images and any accounts that make you feel rubbish about your body. Instead follow body positive and diverse body types accounts. The more you fill your feed with a diverse range of all body types, the more you will feel at peace with your own body.
These tips are one of the many that are featured in my book Be You, Be Free that will help you heal your relationship to food, exercise, and your body once and for all
Click HERE to pre-order your copy now
1), Flegal, K.M., et al., Association of all-cause mortality with overweight and obesity using standard body mass index categories: A systematic review and meta-analysis. JAMA, 2013. 309(1): p. 71-82.