I spent nearly two decades hating my body.
But after nearly being hospitalized for an eating disorder, I knew enough was enough and I put my energy into healing my relationship to my body.
And I tried so hard to love my body, but I just couldn’t. No matter how much I looked in the mirror and told myself that I “loved” what I saw, I didn't believe it.
So, this got me thinking; what is body love anyway and is it realistic and necessary? Do I really have to love my body to heal my body image? By digging deeper, I realised that the goal was never to love my body; the goal was to stop treating my body like a piece of rubbish. And in that moment, I had a mindset shift, and I realised I didn’t have to love my body to heal my body image, instead, I just had to start respecting it. Respecting my body meant choosing kindness over punishment, it meant letting go of the destructive behaviours and the nasty voice in my head that went with it.
This one mindset shift has enabled me to heal my body image. And I want you to know that having good body image doesn’t mean you have to love your body either, having good body image is about respecting your body and treating it with kindness at all times, no matter how you feel about it.
And today I want to share with you my top 3 tips on overcoming negative body image, so that you can shift your mindset and feel more positive today.
1. Practice gratitude.
Practicing gratitude increases happiness and general emotional wellbeing, as well as decreasing stress. Practicing gratitude with your body is being thankful for everything your body does for you. Each day I wake up and I am grateful that I am breathing, and that I can get out of bed easily without any pain. I am also thankful for everything that my body has done for me, despite everything I have put it through over the years. It's strong and it supports me no matter what.
Takeaway: When you wake up in the morning, list 3 things about your body that you are grateful for.
2. Throw out the weighing scales.
Know that your self-worth is not dependent on how much you weigh. That number does not make you intelligent, strong, funny, kind, compassionate, creative, or brave. You are so much more than a number on a scale. Instead, put your energy into treating your body with kindness.
Takeaway: Letting go of my scale was hard. If you aren't quite ready for this step, then it is best to start small. You can start with not weighing yourself with one day a week, and then gradually increasing the days as you feel more comfortable.
3. Focus on your strengths and other personal qualities that have nothing to do with your body.
Rather than focusing on your physical appearance, focus instead on the qualities that have nothing to do with your body. What are your strengths? Are you intelligent, funny, patient, kind, compassionate, a good listener, loving, generous, thoughtful? When I find myself slipping into negative thoughts about my body, I spend a moment reflecting on my strengths.
Takeaway: Spend some time writing down your strengths and the things that you have achieved in life that had nothing to do with your appearance.
THE BIG TAKEAWAY
Always remember that there is absolutely nothing wrong with your body. It may not be what you want it to be, but it’s your body, it belongs to you, and it deserves kindness. Once you shift your mindset from hatred to kindness, it can help transform your relationship.